Onions vs Christmas Trees



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Hilary Shepherd is a freelance writer and Berkeley Mobile Notary living in Berkeley, CA. She is available for various writing projects including guest blogging and ghost writing, assistance with social media marketing, and Wordpress blog setup and installation. Contact Hilary HERE.

I got this joke from a friend the other day. I hope it makes you laugh as much as it made me do so. If you’re offended, you seriously need to lighten up and get a sense of humor. Or two.

The family is sitting at the dinner table. The son asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?”

The father, surprised, answers, “Well son, there’s three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round & firm. In her thirties & forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions.”

“Onions?”

“Yes, you see them, and they make you cry.”

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter says, “Mom, how many types of “willies” are there?”

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, “Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties & forties, it’s like a birch tree, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree.”

“A Christmas tree??”

“Yes dear, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only.”

Oh goodness that’s funny!

dead christmas tree drawing

Image Source: Urban Dead

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