Heidi Montag Miss Universe Performance Video

Answer: Heidi Montag and Miss Universe.

Question: What are two words you never thought you’d hear in the same sentence?

The 2009 Miss Universe Pageant was broadcast live Sunday night on NBC from Atlantis on Paradise Island in the Bahamas. And for some crazy reason, Heidi Montag was chosen to perform.

What. The. Hell.

I hardly know where to start. First of all, Heidi’s ensemble was a total rip off of the flesh colored glittery number that Britney Spears wore a few years back – except when Britney wore it, it didn’t look like she was carrying a load in her pants.

Heidi Montag also wore a black jacket over said flesh colored outfit that she ripped of mid “dance” as well as a headphone microphone but was obviously lip-syncing, clearly another Britney ripoff.

As if watching a car accident, I couldn’t turn away from the “Body Language” and was forced to bear witness to Heidi Montag Pratt’s awkward attempt at shaking her money maker.

By the by, what do you think Heidi’s backup dancers are thinking about when they’re dancing behind such horror? I hope they got paid a whole lot of money to appear on the same stage; it’s can’t possibly be good for their career.

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