Guess what everyone! My little elf has given me permission to launch my new design a lot sooner than I thought, and (finger’s crossed) it’s going live tomorrow! Be sure to check it out and let me know what you think. As we all know Proposition 8 passed on Tuesday making same-sex marriages once again null and void. But that doesn’t mean the fight is over. Several celebrities have spoken out about their displeasure in Prop... 

Don’t know if you’ve heard, but Cheech and Chong are going on tour for the first time in 25 years. They’ve finally decided they’re too old to let their differences get the better of them so they’ve mended wounds and are moving on. Cheech Marin told AP Radio that he and Tommy Chong “looked at each other going, ‘If we’re ever going to do something it has to be now because you’re not getting... 

It’s Friday, it’s hot and I’ve had a long week. ‘Nough said. These glorious insults are from an era when cleverness with words was still valued, before a great portion of the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words. “He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr “He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill “A modest little... 

Sorry for no post last night. I’m still doing the moving thing, and having some issues with getting internet at my new place. Apparently I live on a street where dsl companies don’t want to go. Oh, they’ll do the streets around me, but not my place. Just my luck. Geesh. I realized this week that at my day job I’ve been making what could be 18 hour days, into 9 hour days. Needless to say, I am exhausted by the end... 

Demographics of American Newspapers 1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country 2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country. 3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles. 4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don’t really understand The New York Times. They do, however,... 

Warning: This article contains language that some people (with sticks up their butts) might find offensive. Iconic comic George Carlin died yesterday of heart failure at the age of 71. Shooting to the front row of controversial comedy, George Carlin made his first mark on history with his “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television.” In 1972 he performed his “Seven Dirty Words” routine at Summerfest in Milwaukee,Wisconsin,... 

Oh my gosh, have you watched Swingtown on CBS yet? If you answered no, you’ve totally been missing out. In fact, I think I’m going to make Swingtown is my new favorite show. After moving to an upscale lakeside Chicago suburb in July of 1976, Susan and Bruce Miller must confront temptation in the form of their provocative new neighbors, Tom and Trina Decker, while not abandoning their old friends Janet and Roger Thompson. As... 

We’ve all heard them – and some of us have even used them. I’m talking about the ever barfable cheesy pick-up line. Thankfully, the only ones I hear these days come from the mouth of my boyfriend; who, I’m happy to say is quite creative with his words. And, thankfully, knows better than to use any of these lines. Rednecks take note, these pick-up lines are right up your trailer park alley: *Did you fart? Cuz you blew... 

Yesterday was a pretty intense day, thanks to Britney Spears, so I thought I would start of today with a joke. A Texas gentleman asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an attractive woman. The waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, “This is from the gentleman seated over there,” indicating the sender. She regarded the wine coolly for a second, not looking at the man, and decided to send a reply note to the man.... 

I either have a lot on my mind tonight, or my brain has shut down, because I seem to be having issues focusing on gossip. I’m reading it, but nothing seems to be sticking. Oh my! Did I just say that?? What is my world coming to? As I walked down the busy street, knowing I was late for an important meeting, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days. I saw a person who was wearing... 

During Friday’s live taping of Bill Maher’s show, Real Time With Bill Maher, an audience member decided it would be a good idea to disrupt the show. He was wrong. While Congresswoman Sheila Jackson spoke and Bill listened along with his other two guests, Los Angeles Times columnist Joel Stein and MSNBC’s Chris Matthews, some crazy dude with a 9/11 sign stood up and began shouting. Not one to back down, Maher stood up and... 

Take a moment to think about the worse possible future you can think of. Imagine what the world and all the people will be like in hundreds of years. Think it looks pretty good? Heck, we can only go up from here, right? Think again… Caution: contains language that some may consider “strong” or “vulgar” It’s so scary because it’s true! Brought to you by Fun facts about Carl’s Jr: Founded... 

Here’s a prime example of “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” offered by an English professor from the University of Colorado for an actual class assignment. The professor told his class one day: “Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As homework tonight, one of you will write the... 

The next time you see a little old lady with shaky hands, remember this story: A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door of a sex shop. Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbles the few feet across the store to the counter. Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, stuttering she asks the sales clerk, “Dddooo youuuu hhhave dddddiilllldosss?” The clerk, politely trying not... 

I have my kickboxing class tonight, and decided that would be a great reason to post this joke that someone emailed to me years ago. Take it from this Mississippi Woman—it’s funny. If you’re from Pennsylvania or Ohio, please don’t be insulted—it’s just a joke. ***** Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had set their new wives straight on their duties. The first man had married a woman... 

George Bush goes to an elementary school to talk to the kids to get a little P.R. time in. After his talk, he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him his name. “Stanley,” responds the little boy. “And what is your question, Stanley?” “I have 4 questions: First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third,... 

The following joke is in no way meant to be inappropriate or religiously offensive. Easter is this coming Sunday, so I offer this laugh in the spirit of unity and the knowledge that all religious and moral beliefs aside, we are all human beings and this is the time of year to appreciate life and the earth we all share. A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant. The place was hopping with music and loud... 

10. God worried that Adam would be lost in the garden and he wouldn’t ask for directions. 9. God knew that, someday, Adam would need someone to hand him the TV remote. (Parenthetically, it has been noted that men don’t want to see what’s ON TV, they want to see what ELSE is on.) 8. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor’s appointment. 7. God knew that, when Adam’s fig leaf wore out, he would never buy... 

Two nicely dressed ladies happen to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport. The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man. The second was a well-mannered elderly woman from the South. When the conversation centered on whether they had any children the California woman started by saying, “When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me.” The lady from... 

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. So, instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren’t as good, but easy to reach. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they’re amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the...