Disclaimer: The following was sent to me as an email forward. If it’s not true or accurate, it’s not my fault. If nothing else, it’s just a fun little thing to read. Well, now……here’s something I never knew before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Isn’t history more fun when you know something about... 

Please Note: This is an email forward, so if it’s wrong in any way, it’s not my fault. This one is priceless… A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address! A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel... 

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?” “Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws.” *** A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day… 30,000... 

Here’s another little something funny my mom sent me….. An elderly man on a moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to a doctor at a street light. The old man looks over at the doctor’s sleek shiny car and asks, ‘What kind of car ya got there, sonny?’ The doctor replies, ‘A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a million dollars!’ ‘That’s a lot of money,’ says the old man. ‘Why does... 

Don’t know about where you are, but in my parts, it’s been cold, cold, cold. More so than years past – thanks to the Artic storms that met up in the Artic to create a double Artic storm. My boyfriend was at his cabin in the Sierra Foothills of California last weekend and almost got snowed in. It took him five hours to shovel the driveway enough to get out so he could come home. When my friend sent me the following email, I thought... 

Just a little something to help start your week off with a laugh….. When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive… so, I took her to a gas station… And then the fight started…. ***** After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized... 

I don’t know about where you’re sitting, but where I’m sitting it’s incredibly hot; over 105 degrees hot. Oh, and all the fires in the Northern California region, are blowing their smoke into the valley in which I live. Needless to say, the air out there is on the verge of being unbreathable. These nasty conditions are making me really tired too. I can’t seem to focus. But I don’t want to leave you with nothing, so here… An... 

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids. “WOW,” the social worker exclaims, “are they all yours?” “Yep they are all mine,” the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, “Sit down Leroy.” All the children rush to find seats. “Well,” says the social worker, “then you must be here to sign up. I’ll... 

Once upon a time a guy asked a girl “Will you marry me?” The girl said, “No!” And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank whole bottles of wine, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, didn’t get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, didn’t save money and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theatre, never... 

In 306 days, George W. Bush will finally be out of the White House; which is great for the country, but not so great for bloggers. I mean, think of all the material we’ll lose? I’ve got to get in as many George Dubya posts as I can… President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit the Episcopal Church outside Washington as part of his campaign to restore his pathetic poll standings. His image handler made a visit to the Bishop and said,... 

“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” Catherine Ponder Sure, forgiveness breaks the link, but so does death… Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked, ‘How many of you have forgiven your enemies?’ 80% held up their hands. The Minister then repeated his... 

Disclaimer: This story does not, in any way, reflect me or my life. The other night I was invited out for a night with the ‘girls.’ I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, ‘I promise!’ Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing... 

An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president’s office. The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her... 

Britney Spears is bipolar, plane and simple. I’ve been saying it for months and months, and now finally she is doing something about it. It’s a very good sign that she agreed to this hospitalization and I really hope she stays for a long time. I’ve mentioned before that a member of my family is bipolar, so I know first hand what it’s like to deal with someone with a serious mental illness and is so ill they can’t conceptualize... 

My father used to tell me that it’s just as easy to marry rich as it is to marry poor – you just have to meet the rich. He stopped telling me that a few years ago. Now he just wants me to marry someone. Too bad for him, though; such an event isn’t going to happen any time soon. When Dan found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So, one evening he went to... 

It’s Friday!! Time for a little fun – a new take on an old favorite (in alphabetical order)… AL GORE: I invented the chicken! AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? ANDERSON COOPER – CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the... 

Well, I am certainly having a case of the Mondays today. I hit my head earlier coming up from plugging something in under my desk. Then about 10 minutes ago I pinched the side of my palm in a rusty metal lock and am now watching it turn different colors. Yes, I have ice on it, so don’t think I’m a total idiot. Anyway, now I’m way cranky. An atheist was walking through the woods. “What majestic trees! What powerful rivers!... 

I either have a lot on my mind tonight, or my brain has shut down, because I seem to be having issues focusing on gossip. I’m reading it, but nothing seems to be sticking. Oh my! Did I just say that?? What is my world coming to? As I walked down the busy street, knowing I was late for an important meeting, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days. I saw a person who was... 

Tomorrow is Halloween, which means I have to get my beauty rest so I’m bright and cheery to be dark and dreary. Halloween of Hilary past… A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for awhile, he yells to the waiter, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice,... 

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus could have been Black: 1. He called everyone “brother” 2. He liked Gospel 3. He couldn’t get a fair trial. But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 1. He went into His Father’s business. 2. He lived at home until he was 33. 3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his mother was sure he was God. But then there were 3 equally good arguments that...