And it wasn’t with me!! I’m devastated; just devastated. I don’t think I’ve felt like this since Phil Hartman’s coked-up wife shot him to death. Oh well, I suppose I’m happy for Matthew and his baby’s mama (I refuse to view her as anything more since I am trying by best to be bitter and hate her). Got some blessed news. A celebration of life and bounty. Yes, my girlfriend Camila and I made a baby... 

I reserve the right to post pictures of Matthew McConaughey whenever I darn well please. Are you complaining? I thought not. Ok, I can think of a few people who could care less. But that’s because they’re girls who love girls (you know who you are!). Thanks for the pictures, Right Celebrity and Celebrity Rant! “Matthew” means “son of God” – how perfect is that?! More and more Matthews….. Celebrity... 

And he always will be. Until he meets and marries me, that is. “I love warm weather and summertime…What better way to enjoy it than at the beach, where few people wear shirts?” Um, how about enjoying it in my backyard totally naked. That works for me. The super yummy star and all his shirtless glory is beautifully displayed on this week’s People Magazine: I just had these ones lying around on my computer… A... 

Matthew McConaughey is my husband. He just doesn’t know it yet. My friends and family know it, or at least they are kind enough to indulge my fantasy, and are always on the look out for him. It’s so nice when loved ones enable harmless delusions*. Take a look at my sexy man. Jealous much? Try not to drool, you don’t want to short circuit your keyboard. YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY *Delusion: commonly...