And she doesn’t know how to give a decent lap dance. Paris Hilton and the current love of her life Doug Reinhardt partied it up in Cannes this past week and disgusted all those with whom they came in contact. The gross PDA couple was at the VIP night club in Cannes when Paris decided it would be a good idea to give Doug a drunken lap dance. Side Note: What happened to all that women’s charity work Paris Hilton told Larry King she was... 

John McCain thinks Barack Obama is a “celebrity” – just like Paris Hilton and Britney Spears – and openly questions Obama’s ability to lead this (celebrity obsessed) country. Face it Johnny boy, America is fixated on celebrities – including those celebrities famous for being famous; so who better to run our country than a celebrity? By the way Mr. McCain, the fact that you’re known the world over makes you, by definition,... 

This could be the BIG one, people! That horrific day we’ve known would come sooner or later – when the world goes all topsy-turvy and nothing on Earth is ever the same again. A doomsday event is a specific occurrence which has an exceptionally destructive effect on the human race. The final outcomes of doomsday events may range from a major disruption of human civilization, to the extinction of human life, to the destruction of... 

So does Pete Doherty. Has the whole world gone mad?? Or is it just jacked up on coke? Lindsay Lohan was found with cocaine IN HER POCKET! Pete Doherty is arrested at least once a week. And yet, neither one of them has yet to see the inside of a jail cell. Lock ‘em up! Time behind bars did Paris Hilton a ton of good. Since she’s been out, she’s dumped some friends and has started to spend more and more time alone (something... 

I took some notes last night as I watched Paris Hilton spew forth verbal crap on Larry King Live. *voice is deeper – her real voice – not her high-pitched “dumb” voice *not wearing a lot of makeup, very natural looking *simple hair and clothing *fake eyelashes are annoying *says she only lost a couple of pounds *says all the “girls” there were really nice *admits to having a high voice when she’s nervous or shy, and says she... 

Paris the Heiress was released from jail shortly after midnight on Tuesday. She used a public restroom to change from her orange jumpsuit to a pair of jeans and a jacket before making her appearance. It’s being reported that she lost ten pounds while in the slammer (The only place I can think that she could afford losing ten pounds is her ego!). Paris Hilton looked genuinely happy as she made her way to the SUV carrying her parents.... 

I don’t know about you, but I woke up this morning wondering what Paris Hilton was up to. Around 11:00 p.m. last night, she was transferred from the medical ward back to the all-women’s jail she started her sentence in over a week ago. Hilton, who was being treated for an unspecified medical condition at the Twin Towers jail medical center, was moved to the Century Regional Detention Facility in Lynwood, Calif., at about 11 p.m.... 

Place your bets now. Here’s the latest update from the saga of our favorite Hollywood Heiress, Paris Hilton… *After throwing a fit when ordered back to jail last Friday, Paris has calmed down a bit and decided not to appeal. She will remain in jail and finish out her (original) 45 day sentence. *The mystery illness that helped release her last Thursday was apparently dehydration. Paris was refusing to eat or drink because she... 

“Mom! Mom!” Paris shouted, “It’s not right!” Oh, poor Paris. Your mother can’t help you now, dear heiress. You see, you did a bad bad thing, and you need to be punished. Jack and Jill Public are getting sick of you, and other celebrities, getting away with illegal things just because you’re rich and famous. Robert Downey, Jr. spent a good chunk of time in the slammer and it did him a world of... 

So TMZ is reporting that Paris Hilton is out of jail, after only three days. Her original 45 day sentence was reduced to 23 days. I guess 23 days is really 3 days in Paris Hilton world. Lucky bitch. Full Story There will be a press conference in a little bit, so updates to follow. Paris Hilton Has Mental Problems. Well, duh! Paris Hilton was released from jail early because she’s “on the verge of a nervous breakdown.”... 

Here’s the latest… *Paris Hilton has removed her contacts. Did you know her eyes are actually brown? *Paris is also not wearing any makeup and apparently is getting a positive response to it from the other inmates. I wonder if she will continue this look when she gets out. *She has been visited by both her psychiatrist and her lawyer. *To pass the hours, Paris has been reading a book. The ratio of pictures to words is unknown. *On... 

The sun is setting on Paris Hilton’s second day in jail. According to inside sources, day two was not nearly as fun as day one. Awwww, poor Paris. She isn’t eating or sleeping and her cell is “freezing.” Boo-hoo Paris! Suck it up. If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime (cheesy, but true). You will see no tears from me, Ms. Hilton. TMZ has multiple inside sources who have painted a bleak picture of... 

Paris Hilton is in jail today. Where she belongs. She spent her last night of freedom (for 3 weeks) attending the MTV Movie Awards last night. While being interviewed on the red carpet, Paris said that she was ready to serve her sentence and hoped that she would be a role model to others. She did not however, admit what she had done to deserve her jail time. Hotel heiress Paris Hilton surrendered herself to the Century Regional Detention... 

According to Paris Hilton’s “people,” she is so devastated by her upcoming jail sentence, she simply can’t testify in the civil trial against her. She’s just too distraught. Well boo-friggin’-hoo Paris! Is that the world’s smallest violin I hear? I’m sorry that you’ve been convicted of a crime you committed. I am sorry that you have so much money you can have “people” talk... 

I shall always remember this day as the day that Paris Hilton was sentenced to 45 days in jail for violating her probation. TMZ.com reports… Judge Michael T. Sauer handed down the harsh sentence, telling Paris she will not be allowed work release, furloughs, use of an alternative jail or electronic monitoring in lieu of jail. She must do the time! An emotional Paris, with tears welling up in her eyes, told the judge moments before... 

Los Angeles prosecutors want Paris Hilton to spend 45 days in jail for violating her probation. I TOTALLY AGREE! They also want the “heiress” to wear an alcohol monitoring device (much like the one worn by Michelle Rodriguez) and stay away from booze for 90 days, while the ankle monitor will track her compliance. City prosecutors are also asking that Paris Hilton’s driver’s license be suspended for an another four... 

Um……riiiiight. There’s something strange in the fashion water down in Hollywood these days. Will someone please explain to me what the heck is going on? First we have Avril Lavigne as she will appear on her upcoming album cover. Then there’s Britney Spears in a sheer black dress – and what’s that? – why, it’s a price tag! Very classy Britney, very classy indeed. Below Britney Spears is singer Aubrey O’Day of Danity Kane*... 

Believe it or not, I actually wasn’t going to write anything about the Trash Twins, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, but I just can’t seem to get them out of my mind. As we all know by now, the two have been spending quite a bit of time together since Thanksgiving — Paris, with her perpetually funny looking face, and Britney with no underwear. A true dynamic duo, indeed. So many people are saying that Britney Spears has gone off... 

The drunken-whore stars aligning with the white-trash-mother stars is the only explanation I have for the energy force that created this celebrity pairing. A picture speaks a thousand words, so I will let you enjoy the photos and draw your own conclusions. One thing is for sure, Paris Hilton has a funny looking face, and Britney Spears has fake hair* and no pants. And what’s up with the open mouth, Britney? Maybe they’re trading skills. ...